What if the real work of becoming a better man isn't about optimizing yourself or pushing harder — but learning to grieve? In this episode, Travis sits down with certified coach Michael Brasher, whose path into men's work began at a domestic violence shelter in Arizona, where bearing witness to the everyday pain of women and children forced him to reckon with his own. Michael shares how a feminist theology class in college first cracked open the narrative he'd inherited about manhood — always have the answer, stay in control, never show weakness — and how years of suppressed anger, grief, and self-medication eventually became the raw material for his transformation. He talks candidly about the moment he realized he wasn't an outside observer helping other men change; he was part of the same system he was trying to dismantle. The conversation explores why men's work is fundamentally grief work, how shame and defensiveness block accountability, and why the antidote to much of what ails men is learning to let their hearts break. Michael also shares a simple, powerful feedback question he coaches men to ask the people in their lives — and what happened when he asked it to his own kids. Michael Brasher is a certified coach and founder of Life Unbound Coaching. He hosts a free monthly men's talking circle, leads men's feminist book clubs, and works one-on-one with men navigating generational patterns, relationship repair, and grief. He is active on Instagram and TikTok at Life Unbound Coaching, where his weekly series Men in the Wild breaks down real-world conflicts through the lens of masculine socialization.
Connect with Michael Brasher:
Instagram & TikTok: @LifeUnboundCoaching
https://www.lifeunboundcoaching.com
Connect with Travis:
Instagram: @travers03
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